Being stuck and confused

There is not a feeling on this earth that compares to being behind your peers. Whether you are 18 or 99 we all have peers and we are either ahead of the game or behind them.
I belong in the latter category. My cousins and other peers I know, all have graduated college, a full-time job, have boyfriends, married, having kids or all at once.
I still live at home, have a seasonal type job (most wouldn't consider it a job until winter gets here), I've never had a boyfriend; or shall I say I've never had a guy interested in me before, and I don't have my license (partly because I don't want one right now) it doesn't mix well with my anxiety; believe me I've tried. Disaster. I almost had a meltdown while driving; I couldn't take it.

I guess what I'm trying to get at is: What am I going to do about my situation? Sitting around certainly isn't the option I'm going to use. My anxiety has taken over many things in life. I can't leave my house without palpitations, I can't talk to people, I can't eat in public, I can't even go out to the movies and have a good time. But it won't take the obsession I have to succeed away. To my family and random people I am a "free loader" "bottom feeder" or "lazy person who doesn't have goals." I can see how I give that impression. I don't like talking about what I want to do because I always get the same response "How would you be able to do that if you can't even use the telephone?" Very encouraging, thanks.

I don't know. I'm just confused with life and what I was meant for. I'm sick of being the only one I know who doesn't know why they're here. I know there are many out there, but I personally don't know any.
The only things that make sense TO ME are studying math, the Bible, and the sky.
I hate not knowing what my existence means.